Child of God
The child

shifeng/jasmine/seehong/sunma/poots (whatever u call me!!)
21 so old =(
01081986
Student
NUS Arts/ Social Work
Christian
New Creation Church

Loves
all who matters to me =)
Food! butter corn and raisins!
Pepsi
WESTLIFE!!!

Hates
insincerity

previous posts

wah. i just realized the last blog post was dated ...
what i want to say is, Daddy God you NEVER FAIL to...
today's definitely not one of my better days. =(
ok i'm in the youth hub manning youth hub. let me ...
once again i'm back! after taking a looong hiatus ...
ahh let me set the record straight. i got study ok...
i'm here to blog!!!today's flow of events.. 10am: ...
today is Miracle Seed Sunday!!! =)) Expect expect ...
[ ` *wenbin* ` ] [11th] ~ ウェンビン *~ says:hahah dun...
alright can liao. sighs. another ktv session. 3 co...


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Wednesday, March 22, 2006

( @ 10:29:00 AM )

hii!! hmm... yesterday marks my daddy's 100th day anniversary.. i had a long chat with Auntie Bessie the day before.. she brought me back to the painful memories of my daddy's demise... the pain my family had to go through when Amily and I were stuck back in taiwan..probably have heard it a zillion times.. but it has never failed to evoke the aggrieved pain in me..

i guess, God has spared both of us so mercifully from the agony of acknowledging a body that belonged to someone whom we love and respect. as auntie bessie described the scenes, i thought through the heartache that my other sisters and mom had to go through.. when we were back in taiwan, Hugo(my dad's fav. pet dog) found my dad. in his decomposed state.. it had been four days since we were able to find him. they were called from wherever they were and Amy jie refused to accept the fact that daddy was really gone.. Pastor Rennis, Pastor Tony, Pastor Vincent etc.. were there too. she frantically begged for ressurection.. Serene jie was confused of whether that could be possible.. Auntie bessie den prayed and realised it was the cold truth. the police came and the place was bounded away.. Amy jie being a fighter in spirit tried to break climb over to daddy's body..but was held on by the rest..

the next day was not much easier..it was probably the worse day in their lives.. it was the day where they had to acknowledge the body at the mortuary..only two were allowed, hence my da jie and mum went in first.. i guess the torment they had to go through was undescribable. my dad's face was bloated and beyond recognition.. the situation got out of hand when the rest of them went in. the cries of agony was more than bearable.. when they had to put the body into the coffin, mom and sisters wanted to take a last final look before they sealed it..yet, the man in charge advised them against it. he said, 'leave a beautiful memory of him in your mind.' they decided against it and the body was finally sealed within.

i guess, it's God's plan. to let us leave for Taiwan before anyone realised that daddy is missing. to let us stay in Taiwan.. so that in our memories, will be a daddy that is beautiful, not one that he is found in a decomposed state.. "from dust to dust he returns..." for us, hearing the news in the streets of taiwan wasn't great. it was a shock beyond words. i refused to accept the truth.. and kept believing that daddy will be ressurected again. it was a naive thinkin..but that's what we wanted.. to be able to hug daddy in flesh. we had barely the mood to finish up the tour..however, God forced us through it.. and we realised that we had to be fine, for the sake of my uncle, my auntie, my cousins and esp. my grandma..who loves and cares for us. the tour took our mind off things and helped us tremendously through the early stages of losing daddy..

perhaps some of you might be thinking that i should move on..from this...but i do miss my daddy truckloads..i am not able to hug him in flesh anymore..never able to do the things we want to anymore..but i wont leave my life stagnated but yet live a life that daddy and God wants me to. i fell ill last week and felt a tinge of sadness when i realised that Daddy will never be there to take me to the doctor or hold me so tightly ever again. he will not be there to hold me and comfort me whenever he can anymore..

Daddy, i noe you are up there somewhere.. all of us miss you alot..though we do regret many things..but we'll still treasure whatever memories we have kept..i will learn to be strong and not cry so easily anymore..I Love You, Daddy.



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Sunday, March 19, 2006

( @ 12:10:00 AM )

hello!!! *WaveS* it has been a super sianz-ed week. =( argh argh. so many projects to hand up irritatingly on irritating deadlines. KILL ME! argggghh!!! two down three to go! that's alot more to go!! heaaaaaeeeeellllpppp! we (meanin me and rh) had to postpone many many outings because of the stupid projects and stupid tests!!!!!!!! arrrgh!!!! i wan my couple ring!! i wan =(((

sighs. anyway it seems as though when you are out of something then you will be able to see the whole picture in a clearer view. hmm. i had countless of people around me telling me how he wasn't suitable for me, yet i chose to hang on. i was naive. really naive. how could i see a future in a r/s when i found myself crying every other day(pained my mother), getting shouted at with vulgarities, worrying about how not to make him angry every other day etc.? the worse thing is, you've even said that u didnt like my dad.(b4 he left tt is) that made me really pissed off. not with you, but with myself for not standing up for my dad. i guess i'm not blaming you..but if u happen to read this, please do think about it. have u ever considered about other ppl's feelings before saying or doing anything? if u think ur temper is inborn..den let it be. i'm sorry if i sound harsh..but that period of my life wasn't exactly my happiest.

phew. i just let eeverything out. i really wanted to let it out. thankew..



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Thursday, March 16, 2006

( @ 4:43:00 PM )

hungry!
You Are Apple Pie
You're the perfect combo of comforting and traditional Those who like you crave security
What Kind of Pie Are You?



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( @ 4:39:00 PM )

i dun agree!

You Are 7 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.



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Monday, March 13, 2006

( @ 7:37:00 PM )


presenting......Mr. nice guy!!! =D terence!!!!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:37:00 PM )


heee heeee...i love this!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:36:00 PM )


me and birthday boy!!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:36:00 PM )


okay watch this! this is my fav!!! jungle speed!!!!!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:35:00 PM )


and again!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:35:00 PM )


the people at settlers =D Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:35:00 PM )


HAPPIE BIRTHDAY EDWIN!!!!!!! =D  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:34:00 PM )


terence and boonsong! for celebration of edwin's birthday =D  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:34:00 PM )


we were at my home eating my mummy's yummy food! my mouth was full!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:33:00 PM )


and he wrote this on his notes..=)  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:33:00 PM )


we were in YIH study room studying! =D so guai eh!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 7:32:00 PM )


haha. this is me and pootsie!!!! i look crazy eh..pootsie looking as pretty as ever!  Posted by Picasa



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Saturday, March 11, 2006

( @ 12:55:00 AM )


i love this!!!!! =) so sweet hor!!!!!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:54:00 AM )


love love =) Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:54:00 AM )


first date to ktv. hahaha.  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:53:00 AM )


i'm running out of captions! Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:53:00 AM )


on our way to csl! we weren't together yet. heh. Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:53:00 AM )


little thumb next to big thumb!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:51:00 AM )


always secure in him.  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:51:00 AM )


love =D  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:50:00 AM )


i always look so fat next to him!!!!!!  Posted by Picasa



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( @ 12:49:00 AM )


a promise that we will always keep =) yes?  Posted by Picasa



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Sunday, March 05, 2006

( @ 8:21:00 PM )

hello hello =D it has been ages since i have blogged. many wonderful things have happened. and it's still making me smile just by thinking of it. =) hmm..went to collect results with SLK. just wanna tell shiqi and rahel that me and WAH is sooo proud of u guys.. u guys really made it through the three years and we know it wasn't easy. u guys did it!!! enjoy urselves now yes? i will try to find time for partyworld..i'm dying for it!! but i'm really bugged down by stupid projects and assignments that are piling up due to my laziness!!!! =S hehe. so pardon me eh!! i love u guys sooo much. =D

okay now is the time to feed people who are hungry for gossips. haha. i guess it will not serve as a gossip anymore..hmm. to those people who kept asking and asking and asking..cough *algy* cough *terence*..and many others..yes it's true. haha.. and i'm really really blessed to have him. Sometimes u just noe things are made and planned that u are so sure u want to be in this way for a long long time. Yes..i really wanna thank God for you.. He sent you to me when I needed someone to share my life with. =) He sent you to me when I was getting past all the hurt from losing Daddy. It doesnt serve as a replacement for Daddy..but rather someone who is capable of protecting me with all his life. =)

It is really something that i hadn't expected...totally unexpected i would say..hmm..we've seen each other around..but never expect u to be the one who would bring smiles to my face every other minute. =) The feeling in me is so certain, so true..that i knew you would be the one i would love to spend the rest of my life with..=D so certain that i brought u to see my family and grandma the moment i had a chance. They approved of you=) and it means alot for my family to approve of my bf. =D Even they knew that you were right for me, and able to bring happiness and joy to my life.

At the start, i was kind of unsure..one is that we havent known each other for a long time. and this could be kind of fast. also, i've lost faith. however there are more than enough evidence to prove that you are different from the rest. Sometimes the perfectness frightens me..that it could only be a short lived fairytale story..all i can do is Trust. Trust in the Lord and your love. =)

I've never felt so loved before. It's true and i'm speaking from the bottom of my heart. It made my other relationships stand shy from aside as well as shallow. I've never had someone who took care of me like you did, hold me so securely in your arms like you did. Never had someone who were as patient as you are with me..someone who never flares up at little stuff and someone who lets me have my way in whatever i do. Never had someone who treats me with so much respect and love like you did..a person who loves me with all his might and the things you do reflects your maturity and it makes me feel so protected And assured. Never had someone who never spares me with compliments and praises. Someone who loves me for who i am. Who thinks i'm beautiful the way i am. What more could a girl ask for..? =)

It hasn't been long since we were together..but i feel as though i've been waiting for him for a long long time. the simplicity of this resounds perfectness. i'm so blessed. I'll really cherish this.=D

Today we went to church together..as a non-christian, he was soo patient as he sat next to me as i attended the service. don't worry kay..i'm not pressuring you for anything. just follow ur heart =) Pastor Rennis made a prayer for both of us. thank you, almighty Father in Heaven. Thank you for showing me how grateful i should be about my life=)

Had an enjoyable day though it was short. =) YUPP. we took a neocard. haha.it looks funny coz i pressed wrongly and chose an ugly ugly ugly card. haha. but it's still sweet eh. =) before leaving, he gave me a card. thanking me for everything. it was sweet beyond words. to any other person, it could only be a mushy lovey dovey sort of card..but it made me tear with tears of happiness. Sincerity and lots of love. that's what i felt it to be. =) *touched beyond words*

i still miss daddy alot..but i should be glad that he's released from this world eh? we'll always remember and love u Daddy..You will always be the greatest =D



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